Day ONE

I have got to get out of this rut!!!!!

A little background on what's going on with me...

I'm on my 3rd marriage, and we have 6 children between us.  Four of those I actually gave birth to, and 5 live in this house.  The kids are 3 boys, 17, 14 and almost 2, and 3 girls; 14, 7 and almost 3.  The 7 year old stayed in Philadelphia with her father.  I recently moved back to my small-town home after living in a HUGE big city for 9 years.  I miss it SO much, and I thought I would be happy to be back.  I was so worried about my big city raised husband and blended family adjusting to this new life, that I completely neglected myself.  I forgot all the reasons I left this place.  I forgot how mundane it is to be a housewife.  I forgot how easy it is for me to get stuck in a rut... and stuck in a rut I am!  I have gained 20 lb since I moved back, and need to lose 100 lb.  I have sunk into such a deep depression that I was actually semi-suicidal.  Our family finances are completely out of whack.  My children are driving me crazy.  My husband and I are having disagreements instead of sex.  Things have to change, and I'm the only one that can change them.  I decided to commit to several things.

1. For 30 days, I will eat better.
2. For 30 days, I will exercise in some form.
3. For 30 days, I will post daily in this blog.

Today is day ONE.  So far, things have been easy.  I have been on pinterest for the first time, and got some ideas for home workouts.  I have decided to eat mostly Paleo diet.  I have been inspired by the Whole30 program, but can't afford all the organic and grass-fed and free range until we get our finances straightened out.  I'm going to do as best I can to eat in the Paleo way.  As far as exercise, I'm not going to follow any particular work-out plan as of now.  That might change, but I've gotten workout ideas on pinterest too, so that's where i'm starting now.  I don't have a working scale,but I am around 278lb.  I haven't taken my measurements, but I will do that either later today, or in the coming days.

So far, my eating for today has been on track.  I have yet to work out, but I plan on doing that when i'm done with my blog for the day.  It is easy when I'm home alone to be in this mindset.  I know that my husband will be in a bad mood when he gets home from work tonight, due to our financial situation, but I will do what I can to not let it affect me negatively.